- Joined
- Mar 26, 2021
- Threads
- 20
- Messages
- 2,766
- Reaction score
- 4,493
- Location
- Gone driving life is short
- Vehicle(s)
- Bronco sport
...so two guys wander into a field and come across the deepest hole they've ever witnessed. They ask each other, how deep do you think it is? One guy happens to see an anvil so they both work it closer to the hole and toss it in. The hole is so deep they never hear it hit the bottom.
Suddenly they hear hooves pattering on the ground and a goat comes charging at them, they jump out of the way just as the goat goes straight into the hole, just falling endlessly.
Ten minutes later a farmer comes along hollering for his goat and asking the men if they've seen the goat. They answer with some surprise, well yeah, it just jumped into that deep hole. The farmer responds, no that's impossible he couldn't go anywhere I chained him to my anvil!
Suddenly they hear hooves pattering on the ground and a goat comes charging at them, they jump out of the way just as the goat goes straight into the hole, just falling endlessly.
Ten minutes later a farmer comes along hollering for his goat and asking the men if they've seen the goat. They answer with some surprise, well yeah, it just jumped into that deep hole. The farmer responds, no that's impossible he couldn't go anywhere I chained him to my anvil!
- First Name
- Peter
- Joined
- Feb 21, 2022
- Threads
- 5
- Messages
- 205
- Reaction score
- 305
- Location
- South Carolina
- Vehicle(s)
- Bronco sport
I just swallowed a stack of Scrabble tiles by accident. My next poop could spell disaster.
- Joined
- Mar 26, 2021
- Threads
- 20
- Messages
- 2,766
- Reaction score
- 4,493
- Location
- Gone driving life is short
- Vehicle(s)
- Bronco sport
I'm hear all night, tip your waitress
- First Name
- Major
- Joined
- Mar 5, 2022
- Threads
- 14
- Messages
- 1,038
- Reaction score
- 2,411
- Location
- Right Here Right Now
- Vehicle(s)
- Bronco Sport aka "Spark Plug"
One day an old friend from out of town stops by for a visit. He sees the three legged pig laying by the farmer and asks why does the pig have only three legs?
The farmer says, that pig right there? That’s the greatest pig in the world. One night the barn caught on fire and that pig woke my wife and I and we were able to get the horses out of the barn before they were hurt. Such a great pig.
The friend says, that is an amazing pig, but why does it have only three legs?
The farmer says that pig right there? That’s the greatest pig in the world. One day I was plowing the back 40 and the tractor turned over and pinned me. I thought I was going to die right there. That pig ran all the way home and alerted my wife who got help and freed me from under the tractor. That pig literally saved my life. I love that pig!
The friend says, yes, that is a wonderful pig, but why does it have only three legs?
The farmer replies, well a pig like that you don’t eat all at once.
The farmer says, that pig right there? That’s the greatest pig in the world. One night the barn caught on fire and that pig woke my wife and I and we were able to get the horses out of the barn before they were hurt. Such a great pig.
The friend says, that is an amazing pig, but why does it have only three legs?
The farmer says that pig right there? That’s the greatest pig in the world. One day I was plowing the back 40 and the tractor turned over and pinned me. I thought I was going to die right there. That pig ran all the way home and alerted my wife who got help and freed me from under the tractor. That pig literally saved my life. I love that pig!
The friend says, yes, that is a wonderful pig, but why does it have only three legs?
The farmer replies, well a pig like that you don’t eat all at once.
- Joined
- Mar 26, 2021
- Threads
- 20
- Messages
- 2,766
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- 4,493
- Location
- Gone driving life is short
- Vehicle(s)
- Bronco sport
Speaking of pigs a farmer and his son sit down for bacon and eggs before heading out to the fields. They bless the food they are about to eat, with special blessings for the pigs. The son asks his father why the pigs get special blessing but not the chickens?
The farmer says, son, each animal is important on our farm, but the chickens do their small part to provide eggs for our meal, but that pig...he was committed."
The farmer says, son, each animal is important on our farm, but the chickens do their small part to provide eggs for our meal, but that pig...he was committed."
- First Name
- Jay
- Joined
- Sep 29, 2021
- Threads
- 1
- Messages
- 27
- Reaction score
- 98
- Location
- Along the Strait of Juan de Fuca
- Vehicle(s)
- Bronco Sport OBX, 99 Chevy Silverado 2500, CT90
There were these 3 Bronco drivers who always went bird hunting together and they always rented a hunting dog named Sport from a local farmer. Sport was a great dog and would always hold point and find any birds they'd shoot. One year they didn’t go hunting and the farmer rented Sport out to some Jeep owners who used him that season. The next year the Bronco guys went to rent Sport from the farmer for hunting but the farmer had bad news for them. He told them Sport was no longer any good for hunting and didn’t have a replacement for him and to tell the Jeep guys they were not welcome there any more and that if he saw them he would probably shoot them for what they did to Sport. The Bronco guys asked the farmer what the Jeep boys did that could be so bad. Well the farmer said last year when they rented Sport it all started off fine until one of the Jeep guys decided to rename him. We ll whats wrong with that they asked. The farmer said they renamed him "Wrangler" and now all he does is sit on his ass and bark all day.
A great-grandson asked his great-grandfather who was living in an assisted living community if he was “getting any “ on the side. Grandpa answered “ Hell it’s been so long since I have had any I didn’t know they moved it.”
- First Name
- Mike
- Joined
- Nov 3, 2021
- Threads
- 6
- Messages
- 1,133
- Reaction score
- 1,707
- Location
- Calgary, AB
- Vehicle(s)
- 2022 Ford Bronco Sport
Saved this one to post on my community chat, but it never made it there, so I’d better share it here.
- First Name
- Mark
- Joined
- Oct 30, 2021
- Threads
- 100
- Messages
- 5,261
- Reaction score
- 9,866
- Location
- St. Jacob, IL
- Vehicle(s)
- 2021 Badlands | 2020 Escape
A traveling salesman was driving down a country road when he saw something out of the corner of his eye. To his astonishment, it was a three-legged chicken racing down the side of the road alongside his car. He glanced at the speedometer and saw he was traveling 50 mph!
Suddenly, the chicken changed directions, paralleling a side road up toward a farmhouse. Fascinated, the salesman slowed, made a U-turn, then turned up the road to follow the chicken.
As he approached the farmhouse, the salesman saw a farmer standing in the yard. He slowed and stopped the car when he noticed the farmer watching him. As he got out of the car the farmer said, "Can I help you?"
"You're gonna think I'm crazy," said the salesman, "but I just saw a three-legged chicken running down the road at 50 mph!"
"You're not crazy," laughed the farmer, "my son and I raise them."
"You raise three-legged chickens?"
"Well," said the farmer, "my son and I both like drumsticks, so we thought why not get an extra one with every chicken?"
"Hmmm. Interesting," the salesman mused. "How do they taste?"
"I don't know; we've never caught one."
Suddenly, the chicken changed directions, paralleling a side road up toward a farmhouse. Fascinated, the salesman slowed, made a U-turn, then turned up the road to follow the chicken.
As he approached the farmhouse, the salesman saw a farmer standing in the yard. He slowed and stopped the car when he noticed the farmer watching him. As he got out of the car the farmer said, "Can I help you?"
"You're gonna think I'm crazy," said the salesman, "but I just saw a three-legged chicken running down the road at 50 mph!"
"You're not crazy," laughed the farmer, "my son and I raise them."
"You raise three-legged chickens?"
"Well," said the farmer, "my son and I both like drumsticks, so we thought why not get an extra one with every chicken?"
"Hmmm. Interesting," the salesman mused. "How do they taste?"
"I don't know; we've never caught one."
